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i pride myself in being able to understand (i.e. read) people well. but this guy is just really giving me a run for my money.

yes, it's the guy i've dated over the past few months. mr here-and-now. he is what my friend would call my "meantime" guy. and i think i am his "meantime" gal, as well.

one night, in a pub, admidst beers and loud american pop music, (i think) i heard him say "my wife once called me..."

"your WHAT?!?!" my mind was screaming. either he was drunk, i was deaf, or he was really trying to tell me something. and the irony of it all, he was checking up on my emotional state the night before. (i was suffering from PMS depression, and had a sobbing fit for a while. he saw me at some point.) my heart flip-flopped (literally) and i felt my face getting warm. but he was too preoccupied to notice, thank god.

what is it with me and men??? i always end up with those who are totally wrong for me. and the saddest part is, i fall for them. pretty hard. and though i tell myself to keep things simple, i find myself liking this guy even more each day. some things you never learn.

you want to know what the even bigger irony is? HE was the reason i fell into a depressive fit. but of course, i didn't tell him that. because that would mean admitting he meant more to me than i let on. and as long as he thinks i'm emotionally detached, i'm safe.

he still takes me out for coffee. he still gives me goodbye-kisses on the cheek, when not many people are around.

of course, i still let him.